i'm facing a huge financial crisis now, after doing my math. I don't know if it has been a sensible choice. where i had always wanted to go only cost $3000. now i'm given a place very very far away... very exciting... but it means its bread for breakfast, lunch and dinner. I must control my spending... eat dinner in hall... dun anyhow go out and buy clothes... no more beer and smoke... no more no more... my tuition pay is miserable, my tuition kid is always calling off tuition... i feel happy i don't have to travel, but i earn $30 less. perhaps i shouldn't go on another humanitarian trip... i should spare a thought for others around me... money is so important... i won't die if i don't go on humanitarian trips. then why i die die aso want to go ne? volunteering is such an expensive hobby... then our funds is always not enough to cover our capital, and we have to fork out from our own pockets... then we enjoy but our parents pay so much... i'm so not being fair to them... i think it's important to have money... not for ourselves... but to be able to give our children the same kind of opportunities our parents give us... maybe we should go back to barter trade... i can live without alot of things... like the piano. its stale and dirty. ok... to everyone out there reading my blog... no matter how much u miss me, please do not ask me out for dinner, do not ask me to pay for any birthday presents (everyone's turning 21 this yr), do not ask me to do anything that has to do with money!!! please!!! there's so much price to pay just because of my foolish heart...