... it's not the money we raise, it's the rejection we face...

is this a naive thought? i've always been optimisstic and i really want to fulfil juz's wish. have i been doing things blindly but i didn't think it was too much for me to take. how am i suppose to judge who is right and wrong??? the only one i can talk to is forever so busy and doesn't even have the time to reply my msg. people are really hard to manage. if i ever get stressed up it's not because i don't bring in enuff sales but having to face unhappy faces everyday.
how i wish i could go back to school. headache sia.
my mum was admitted to NUH. the moment i stepped into the room i see my mum lying on the bed with a tube in her nose. she could hardly talk or open her eyes. i never expected her to see her like that. i thought she would be sound asleep after the operation... but little did i realise the sight of her made me experience tremendous pain in my heart. i wanted to cry but i couldn't... the air was too dry and all i felt was the sting in my nose. so i left the ward leaving her to sleep but i know she would have to suffer in slience thruout the night... i don't feel very happy anymore. i think i'm going to get dangerous mood swings and i'm going to fail as a leader. i don't have my own stand or opinions. i can hardly handle a group of 6 people and it gets on my nerves everytime i see an 18yrold act cute and tries hard to be serious at the wrong time and worse, put words into my mouth. maybe i'm like that too and maybe i irritate people as well. speculate all you want. that's how a time bomb initiates it's own countdown.